Goals vs. Pipe Dreams

 

 

 

 

In the previous entry on this blog (Happiness and Worry Cannot Coexist), I spent some time expounding on the idea that I wasted much of my life on dreaming of lofty goals for the future. I necessarily did not mean that future goals were something to be avoided entirely. My main point was that spending so much time thinking about the future and those lofty (and many times unattainable) goals. or more accurately defined as "pipe dreams",  detracted from the time I could have spent enjoying the present.

As I draw nearer to the end of this life, however, I have returned to thinking about a couple of those goals. Nothing, mind you, that would be unfeasible, and thus move into the realm of "pipe dreams", just goals that are accessible given my current situation. One in particular is actually possible and after talking with someone who could help me accomplish that goal, I think it may actually come to fruition.

I admit I never heard him say it myself, but apparently my maternal grandfather thought I would grow up to be a preacher.  (I heard this from my maternal grandmother several years after his death.) Of course, my life took a different path, and I never graduated to go to divinity school.  I could listen to various preachers in churches and sort of fantasize about being able to do the same, but it would seem that such dreams were out of my reach.

After all, not only did I suffer from a fear of public speaking, I didn't think I actually knew enough about scriptures to qualify.  But things have changed recently. I have been in conversations with the pastor at my church and he has been receptive to the idea of allowing me to take the pulpit at sometime in the near future.

The good thing is, after several years in a recovery program, in which I have had the privilege and opportunity to share, I no longer have that fear of public speaking. It turns out that public speaking is not the devastating nightmare I had previously imagined it to be.  On the other hand, I still have no degree in divinity,  but my pastor has assured me that I can handle that problem fairly well without the sheepskin.

The trick of course, is not to allow the feasible translate into the unfeasible. A borderline egocentric fellow  might imagine that everyone in the church comes forward at altar call and rededicates their life. I don't want to get caught in THAT trap. Too many times over the past 60+ years I have fantasized about having a greater impact than I was ever capable of achieving on my own merit. Guess what? I enjoyed having roles in school plays, but I knew I was never going to be Oscar material. Staying grounded is the best way to approach life.

As for those other goals? Well, realistically, I have to admit that my financial status here may make at least one of them be in the realm of "not bloody likely" as my British friends would say.  But those don't occupy my waking moments very much.  I'd much rather spend my time thinking about how I may be of help to people in the here and now rather than some uncertain future.  

May your spiritual journey be fruitful.

Quiggy