"Failure" does not occur when you fall down. "Failure" occurs when you do not get up again.
The concept of giving up, conceding defeat, has always been an anathema to me. The old adage of "if at first you don't succeed, try try again" is an optimistic way of saying it, but also the classic children's tale of The Little Engine That Could ("I think I can, I think I can") plays over and over again in my struggle to achieve success.
Years ago I tried to attend recovery meetings in Austin (I lived about 30-50 miles south in San Marcos). Most of the time I left San Marcos with the intention of attending such-and-such meeting somewhere in Austin, but I only had a general address for the meeting. Since this was in the days before I had GPS on my phone, I relied heavily on remembering details from checking out the location on my home computer before leaving.
On more than one occasion I would arrive at the location, only to find that it was in a business park, or a mall setting, and I had no idea which building in particular I was looking for. On those rare occasions when I came up empty, I would travel back to San Marcos somewhat defeated. But that insistent feeling I had of never wanting to admit "complete defeat" would inspire me. So on the next occasion to try to find that meeting I would use Google maps and the option of "street view" on the maps so I could look at the front door of the entrance and know what I was looking for the next time.
The first sentence of this blog entry is my own encapsulation of various other quotes that I have read on the subject of failure. One of my favorites, however, comes from a guy who really exemplifies the "can do" determination of someone who refuses to let failures defeat his perseverance.
I think that cultivating an attitude of perseverance in the face of defeat is a useful thing in many circumstances. Ultimately I have to use discretion in how I approach the situation. What I mean is, hearkening back to previous entries on this blog, if the situation is something I can actively control, in this case using utilities available to me to achieve success, I can come to a solution to the dilemma at hand. The key is knowing which situations are within my control and which are not.
To me, this means that failure to control outside influences is not necessarily "failure". Is it failure that I can't actively stop the progression of the cancer I have on my own? No, not in the least. But it is failure if I give up and just let the chips fall where they may without taking advantage of the resources to help. Neither is it failure when I rely on my recovery group to help me overcome addiction. Even though the source book for the program stipulates that admitting "complete defeat" as a requirement to go forward, that defeat is only failure if, after admitting complete defeat I remain unwilling to accept help.
There is a negative factor to defeat, but then, there can also be a positive factor to it, if only I am willing to learn the lessons being presented to me. My spiritual advisor, whom I choose to call God, has a lesson for me in this situation. Perhaps it is only that I can use my experience to inspire others to persevere, rather than becoming a unique case of how faith can bring about miracles; i.e. "faith healing", which I have often said I don't entirely believe in in the first place. But just writing the blog entries has been effective on my own outlook on life, and I guess that could qualify as an aspect of "faith healing"...
May your spiritual journey be fruitful.
Quiggy
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